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Jan. 4th, 2015

Surreal yet cathartic

Hi LJ.

It's been 6 years, and you're still here!  When I feel a little nostalgic I always pop by, see if anyone is still writing, doesn't look like it, maybe I'll browse over old posts - this is remember, a real life reminder of meeting my husband (as it happened on this site 10 yrs ago this August).

I left facebook on Jan 2nd.  I don't know how long for and I almost feel like I'm doing something illegal by de-activating my account.  It won't be forever, and probably won't last all year but I wanted to bring some focus back to me.  Nobody reads this site anymore so I get to post things most people won't see but still gives me a sense of "updating the interweb" on my life.  No particular reason for leaving but I use it as such a crutch these days I'd like to remind myself of life without it.  For instance ; I was using this site way before facebook, it's fitting I should return.

I do not need to give you 6 years of an update, people have died, people have been born, people have gotten married, people have had kids, I'm still happy with my hubby and we have a crazy nephew here, I also got to meet the rest of my pinoy familia in 2012, all my darling nieces and sister in-laws, it was great!  Alot of the people on here I don't actually have on facebook, but in equal measure there are some I have met and those I've yet to have met but still are my friends on facebook.. that of course is irrelavent now.

So I may pop by from time to time and update if I feel the need to release (excuse the graphic imagery your dirty mind might produce).  My avatar is 6yrs old too.  I've gained weight but ironically became happier in myself.  Fuck it, i'll keep it as it is for nostalgia's sake.

Here endeth the post.

Aug. 1st, 2009

Soooo.. is LJ over now?

 It just occured to me, um nobody (save 1 or 2 in my friends list) update LJ regularly anymore

Me included

Awww.. LJ's over now isn't it?

We've all moved on to facebook and twitter and whatnot, and they'll soon be going from A-list to C-list like Myspace or Friendster

That's life and we're all guilty of it but I have very very fond memories of when this was THE hotspot, to get everything off your chest (and in my own personal story meet the love of my life and marry him)

I've met some wonderful people here, granted most are Filipino (the English don't really vent via the written word they just tend to moan a lot)

Most of whom I'm still very much in touch with either internetedly or otherwise.  I've thoroughly enjoyed reading all your posts, Pinoys tend to command the English language in such a way that they can make every word shine brighter, mainly due to using correct grammar (we NEVER got taught grammar in school.. I never thought it was uncommon 'til people with English as a second language seemed to write better)  Not slamming my fellow Brits.. we have some great writers, I'm not one of them.. I mean I write as I speak but thats the point of a journal, people told me they imagine me speaking what I say cos its exactly how I would, so its less like reading.. I take it as a compliment.

So this isnt goodbye LJ, I will still update the odd time, you're still on my bookmarks, don't fret.

But yeah, no one was saying it so with a heavy heart...


Miss ya xoxo


Apr. 29th, 2009

Whats going on with Me?

 Well I haven't updated in a seriously long time, I have no idea how long so If I'm repeato boy then deal with it.

its mundane.. but its life.Collapse )

Mar. 17th, 2009

Magical Mystical Musical Meme!

1) What is the first song you ever remember hearing? How old were you?

Hmm I would think it was "(There Must Be An Angel) Playing With My Heart" by the Eurythmics, it was on the radio non-stop when I was starting to realise music existed.  Still love it with all the *COMPLETELY OUT OF TUNE" Ladadidadadadumda. daaadaaaa, daaaaauh Da"

2) What was the first album you ever bought on your own? What format?
First ever album I ever bought was East 17 - E:17 man they were so much better than Take That, granted I didnt even know their music, I was kinda forced to buy it to hide my gayness and my older cousin who my parents hoped to model me against, was a big fan.  I actually ended up lovin them, oh my 2nd was Peter Andre - Natural (the shame)

3) What was the first CD you ever bought?
I bought 2!  My First was LL Cool J - Aint Nobody, single (mainly because it was from the Beavis & Butt-head movie and they were on the cd cover) and fab brit girl-group (3 blacks and a token white for a change) Eternal - I wanna be the only one.  I remember my mum being mad I spent so much and me trying to convince her "it has 4 songs mum, its practically a mini-album!"

4) What was the latest album you've purchased?

Legally.. christ.  Um.. oh man its only for presents I buy them now, at a stretch I think it was Floorfillers : Club Classics, a compilation of 90's club tunes, and that was um.. nearly 4 years ago.. *runs and hides from police*

5) What song/s takes you straight back to Primary school?

Mainly 90's songs from *early* 90's.   2 Unlimited - No Limit, Mark Morrison - Return Of The Mack, I really wasnt into music back then, so It has to be party tunes like Macarena and Saturday Night by Whigfield

6) What was the theme song of your high school prom?

We didnt have a prom.  *weep*

I didn't get to wear my pretty dress, huhuhuCollapse )
Tags: ,

Feb. 24th, 2009

Album Maker


1 - Go to "wikipedia." Hit “random”
or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to "Random quotations"
or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album. (make sure you hit the new random quotations button at the bottom)

3 - Go to flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”
or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use photoshop or similar to put it all together (http://www.picnik.com/) works well, online.

5 - Post it with this text in the "caption" and TAG the friends you want to join in.

Feb. 18th, 2009

Quick blah blah

 I saw "Shopaholic" last night, it was previewed, and I loved it, but I'm not sure whether I loved the film for the plot or for the fashion!!  (But I loved it when the mannequins would come to life to talk Rebecca Bloomwood into buying the clothes)

I'm off to Thailand in April and seriously thinking, "shall I just have the sex-change to wear these gorgeous clothes?" lolz, unfortunately I love my groin, and though a gucci purse would make me happy, I'd rather not be Stumpy McStumperson in the genitalia department!

Also.. I nearly wet myself with joy after seeing a trailer for the Hannah Montana Movie!!! (instert shame here)

Feb. 10th, 2009

Purge Thy Soul

( You are about to view content that may only be appropriate for adults. )

Jan. 2nd, 2009

2008, Ok I'm over it.


So if anything this years motto is "I'm over it"  Its a phrase I use during arguments when I  just want happy times, I use it towards things I was or had looked forward to that have either been and gone or.. I'm just not excited about anymore.

Probably the worst example I could use is today, at my great-grandmothers funeral.

Gwendoline (and the line is actually pronounced that way)  was 91 when she died in hospital from Pneumonia (which btw, she got in hospital WTF! and this is AFTER she got MRSA - and before that, the whole reason she was there in the first place was cos she had like the 60th heart attack.  The woman just wouldnt die.

After so so so many false alarms I actually trained my body to believe she was already dead, am I like a total bitch?

You see we never had a bad relationship but I mean it wasnt a super close one either, I disliked how she favoured her one daughter over the other (the other being my grandmother) eventually this constant favouring really shut me down emotionally to her, I just love my grrandmother and the way she clambered for her mothers love to be spurned everytime in favour of the younger christian child just pissed me off and upset me, so I stopped visitng when I was about 15, Xmases only.  She moaned she never saw her grandchildren but in fact favoured just one, my cousin, SHOCK HORROR the favourites daughter.  Everything was poor her poor her, she had the audacity to say me and my other cuz were "too old for easter" in terms of presents (which never bothered me, had she not bought her fave grandchild 12 yrs MY senior a washing machine!!)  

So I carried this grudge, it wasnt personal but even when someones being nice to me, if they're being a shit to someone else thats just as bad.  I visited this year and I could tell it was the last time I'd see her, I decided she'd die this year and I dont want to see her any other way than upbeat and alive.  She went into hospital September, we gave it 2 weeks, she lived.. but was not leaving the hospital, I accepted her as dead either way and mourned my still alive grandmother, I had no fond memories, nor evil, but I liked her despite her being a shit to my gran.  A week ago I got a text :


I said oh, and went back to sleep.  Harsh?  Well I was smiling but not out of malice because me and her had an understanding.

Eventually the funeral came today, I was a pallbearer, I carried the old dear in and out of the church and the crem.. even in the eulogy, the favourite child was the only person mentioned in name.. grrr.  The way I saw it she was gone, she was lonely for the last 17yrs after my great grandfather passed away, I see no reason to be sad she's not with us, because this is what she wanted.

 I then remembered the ONLY time I visited her on my own, and she admitted she missed my grandfather terribly and cant wait to go.  I thought about saying "dont be silly we need you here" and I distinctly remember agreeing with her instead saying "me too, I dont want you suffering, you were happiest with him".  

Since then, thats when I wrote her off, it wasnt until 2 yrs later she left us, but I'm glad she did, it was a fitting tribute she got the best xmas present ever, her beloved back in her arms and her soul at peace.  But imagine your reaction when the favourite child (my auntie) asked 

Fave : How did you find the service
Me : yeah great, I'm over it.

And you know what, I didnt even care.

Mwah xxx Over it.

Dec. 22nd, 2008

I wish you a merry xmas..

 I wish you a merry xmas...

I wish you a merry xmas..

and a happy new yr.

Here's hoping none of you die, get a terminal illness or poo yourselff in a drunken stupour.


Nov. 16th, 2008

Bye Bye Blondie

I still haven't gotten around to posting pics of my fabulous Drag Debut, but til  marvel at my new look!

Being blonde and blue eyed with straight hair never needing to be styled people think I have it easy cos its what they want.  I mean I'm a textbook case of the Aryan Race - according to Hitler I'm supreme.. then again being Gay do you think he would have made an exception?  Yeah, didnt think so, double edged sword.  But seriously since I was a kid I always wanted darker hair cuz I was so sick of the same colour, every stylist would tell me no, my mum was afraid it'd make me pale.. so I kept the blonde hair and funnily enough it became my trademark, I grew it after 19 yrs of having it short and it was little changed throughout  4 years, now at 23 I thought fuck it, I'm going darker, and short again.  Luckily for my b-day my friend promised a free cut and finish in his salon.  So I went and .....

TA DA!Collapse )


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